3. Precious Is as Precious Does
I awoke to something wet on my ear. Muttering feebly, I swatted at it and cracked open one eye. With a hoarse yelp, I shot backwards across the bed and into a warm body. I heard a muffled “ooff!” and a muted thump even as I stared at the tiny creature sitting on the side of my bed.
“What in 7 hell’s is that!?!” I yelled, and immediately regretted it as I grabbed my pounding head. I registered the inside of my mouth tasted rather like a cesspool and my tongue felt like it was covered in some sort of hellish fuzz. The tiny creature’s nose wrinkled at me.
I heard an abortive snicker and swiveled my head around to scowl deeply at my husband, who sat sprawled out on the floor, naked as a jaybird. He quickly wiped the fiendish grin off his face.
“Good morning, Gorgeous.” He said seriously. “How’s your head?”
“Don’t you ‘Gorgeous’ me, Devin MacKenizie!” I growled. “You know perfectly well how my head is! And what in the Flaming Hell’s is that?”
I jerked a thumb over my shoulder. He raised up and peeked around me, a brief smirk crossing his lips before gazing at me in perfect innocence.
“That’s a Felifox, Dear.” He replied reasonably. “Don’t you remember? You said she could stay.”
“You spawn of a thrice cursed Hellhound Cur! Of course I don’t remember! I drank a whole bottle of Tequila last night! I don’t even know how I got to the bed!”
He did grin at me then. Unrepetantly.
“I’ll have you know, I’m descended from a very respectable line of curs. None of which were ever cursed.” He joked playfully even as I growled again. “And I poured you into bed right after you threatened to turn Mr. Johnson into a frog.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose between my fingers and sighed heavily, feeling my stomach turn over queasily.
“Exactly why did I threaten to turn Mr. Johnson into a Frog, Devin?” I asked in a long suffering tone as I looked up at him again.
“He was threatening to have Bear destroyed by the magistrate.” Devin supplied helpfully.
“Why?”
“Bear bit him in his butt.”

