I asked the author, M. D. Elwell, about her thoughts concerning the world she is writing in and about. What follows is some of the thoughts she posted in her Live Journal in a locked post. Since the post contains personal information, I am only going to copy what relates directly to the stories she writes. I hope this will help some folks who might be uncertain as to whether this is worth reading to give the stories a try.

I have tried to keep the spirit of the post with only some minor spelling or grammar corrections.

Several people have been asking me about my stories lately and I think I just sort of blank out at the questions.

The best answer to that question, now, is: I come up with the ideas as a direct result of things that happen to me in real life.

Writing is the only way I can tell the stories of what happened/happens to me. To sit down and actually tell someone about something that happened to me that affected me on a deep emotional level is pretty difficult for me. Some of the emotional trauma that happened to me in earlier Life was just too much and as long as I pretended it really wasn’t me that it happened to, I could stay functional. It’s hard to have any kind of emotional breakdown when you have loads of responsibility to attend to, especially when those responsibilities involve small children.

And “Esme” was birthed.

Esme was that part of me that just couldn’t cope and was overwhelmed with the pain of stuff. As long as Esme had her little corner of bright, comfy cushions, her blankie and a couple of stuffed animals, she was ok with being locked up in a corner padded room in my mind. Sometimes, she’d have these fits and I’d tell her stories to keep her calm. The stories were the things that happened to me/us, but wove into science ficton/fantasy with characters who weren’t me/us.

Esme is the emotional/emotionless me. Meaning, Esme reacts to things from a gut level. Esme is also meaner than an insane junk yard dog and ruthless with extreme prejudice. IN short, Esme is not nice. Well, neither am I, really, but then I am the logical one. Meaning, I respond to things after thinking about them. Over the years, I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve been accused of ignoring everything. That’s not the case. I may look at stuff with a poker face and seem like I don’t care one way or the other, but in my head I’m having this moment where I’m analyzing my response. I’m cranky and grumpy and tired and trying to come up with the best solutions to problems, not uncaring.

Writing is a way of dealing with things that couldn’t be dealt with on a priority basis. Writing is a way for me to organize my thoughts and feelings.

Sometimes the writing flows out of me the way water flows out of a well spring. Sometimes, it has to be dragged out kicking and screaming. The end results are never what I envisioned or expected, but they fit.

I took a creative writing class once. I drove the instructor bonkers. Apparently, creative writing isn’t so creative. It’s supposed to be structured and has this set of rules to follow. A story is supposed to have an outline and sceanarios and characterization in advance of ever putting pen to paper (Or cursor to Word Document). I’ve never done that. I had to do it for the class and boy was it ever frustrating. Right up there with being told that modern poetry should never, ever be written in rhyme. I knew I could write and be published, ‘cuz I did once sell some work. However, being told that I had to follow a certain set of rules in order to be “successful” took all the fun out of it for me. Then Life got in the way and the next time I felt like being creative, I taught myself how to knit.

I write again now. I think Alternate Universes began as a way to keep myself sane and to keep my sense of humor about work, my marriage, Maryangel, being overwhelmed with 6 animals in the house and Life in General.

The thing about Alternate Universes is that it could be set anywhere. There are hints in it that it’s really just our own world, but our world as it might have been if magic and mythical beasts existed in abundance. I never intended to seriously work Alternate Universes into a fully functioning work of fiction complete with maps, regions, governments, ect. It’s just something that flows from my mind to the keyboard to the cursor on the word document and when it’s done, it may or may not be entertaining for others to read. And given the lapses between the blurbs of the stories, well, really, there was never any sense in me trying to format it the way I’m sure my creative writing instructor would have wanted me to.

Alternate Universes is just that; an alternate universe. It’s taking the already known existence and twisting it with your imagination. This concept is widely utilized by fanfiction writers. Some of them are highly entertaining. Some of them really should never try to write anything more than a grocery list ever again.

Me, well, I utilize this concept to entertain myself and keep Esme on a leash. I’ve never really thought about making Alternate Universes a real series of stories with publication in mind. At this point in my life, that’s just not a realistic expectation of myself. I know I don’t have the ambition needed to seriously write for publication. I’m lucky if my ambition extends enough to get the laundry done or the house cleaned, I’m that fatigued on a consistent basis. It’s gotten better now that I’ve had the chance to just do nothing and rest, but it’s not enough to really actually put towards anything outside of maintaining my household.

So when I’m asked about cleaning Alternate Universes up into a submitable manuscript or about the world layout or the directions I’m going with the story, my initial response is to just sort of blink at the question in bewilderment while Esme rolls around on the floor howling with hysterical laughter.

The answer is: I have no clue. I just write it.

I think that’s why I like fanfiction. It’s just taking a “what if?” and running with it. No real direction needed. Just write.

It drives serious writers up the wall bonkers.

So, the answer to all those questions about Alternate Universes is *SHRUG* I really don’t know.

In the meantime, World of Warcraft is kind of fun. Bashing ogres is good stress relief.

ME

I think that this is the reason many of us tell the stories we do. We take a “What if?” and expand on it.